[ life:revisited 2010 + 1 ]

Yep. Just in case you didn't know.

Well.

Here I am questioning my alcoholism level, as I nurse a glass of Chicago's finest merlot, and I review my life's choices. Anger vs. Calm. Etc., Etc., For the first time, I think that I am starting to change. Yes. This change is just like the post before. But before you worry, its a bit of a change. Its a change, but different. As a friend once said to me, every man is a moon; they have a dark side they hope no one sees. Well, for a time there, the dark side seemed to be the predominate side. Its hard to really refuse the dark side, everyone knows that. Shit, ask Anakin Skywalker. Everyone knows its easier to be angry and be the angel of revenge, than to forgive, and be the angel of mercy. Not a whole lot of people have the talent of being merciful, and forgiving the shortcomings of others that infuriate us. That is the definition of Grace. And some of my friends do have that. Which brings me to the point.

Maybe I do have mental issues. It is certainly possible. But tonight, even before I decided to partake in alcohol, I was thankful for my life. Yep. Just like Freddy Mercury, I realized that everyone is under pressure. And here is the point kids, so get the pens and paper ready, as I know you have sitting next to you as you read this (maybe you have the local phone book, flipped open to mental health providers instead, for me, but I digress). But here is the holy grail, fountain of youth, and excalibur for me.

I'm not crazy.

Yep. You heard it here first.

I may have some anger issues, but upon true reflection, everyone has an issue they are trying to deal with, and that makes me no difference. I made a big deal of myself, for whatever reason. I no longer believe I am as alone as I thought. I am an individual, for sure, I am different, without saying. But in being unique, I have realized that uniqueness is a relative term, because the unique do not always realize that there are others there that are similar, that may have more experience on the subject. Let alone books, movies, anime, and other stimuli that may help me understand the term 'unique'. So I guess that means that I am on the road to life. The road to recovery. The road to understanding. Maybe its age, maybe its divine intervention. Whatever it may be, things are-a changin. Yeah, sometimes I hate my job with the fire of a thousand supernovas, but I'm not the only one, and POOF! I just finally found something out about my situation.

I found out how to deal. Deal with myself that is. :)

So, without further ado, I leave you with this:
I love my life, I love my girlfriend, and I wish you....my kind of success.

Being crazy isn't all that bad, you just deal. Just like many of you, who I know are crazy, you are just better than me at dealing. Oh, and I love my friends too. :) And to anyone who thinks I don't think of you, think again. Crazy people think wayyyy to much. Heh. And finally, I wish you....

Good luck, and good night.